oh no he didn't

Oh yes I did.

Illustration 1:
I'm in Checkout Line 3. Products have started to be scanned and one additional cart with @35 items stands between me and my turn. I have 7 items.

Express Line 2 is closed. Express Lane 1 is open with at least 10 customers.



Illustration 2:
My eyes follow a new checker weave through the checkout stands to pull the next customer in the Express Lane 2. He walks around to his station as the chosen one moves her cart over to Express Lane 2 (A).

No one follows. I have time to follow the previous rearrangement, look at the items on the belt, items waiting to leave the cart in front of me, and still have a moment to calculate what, if any, time to be saved. No bodies follow the first to the new line.

I make my move (B) and only then does the third person in Express Lane 1 locks eyes with me in a challenge of iron wagons (C). Three steps ahead and she didn't stand a chance; I was visualizing my placement before her wheels even started to creak over.



My defeat foe stood behind burning holes into my neck. I smiled in return, placing each item individually on the belt not sure if she felt annoyed due to her secondary position behind the chosen one and that implied entitlement or merely thought I had broken the 15 items or less rule with my deft lane change. Thing is the cashier only cares about the one he picks out and I learned long ago that making the move wouldn't necessarily mean it would be faster than remaining put, but shit lady, it's a dog eat dog world out there and I clearly made it in line before you Slowly McSlowerson.

I was a man with a goal. Deal with my dust.

darn I forgot to add this to my list

The third weekend in May:
Mike the Headless Chicken Festival

it smells like a mid life crisis

Somehow things just work out.

I have come to accomplish the goals in my life simply by the natural course of how things played out. Now I've come to realized that one cannot participate in life with out putting a little effort into it. Often I think that fate and dumb luck has play a bigger role in the past for me as I merrily merrily floated down the stream.

Now as I transition into the second and final part of life (avg life expectancy + turning 35 = the slow end) I've decided that I need to grab life's little neck and wring it for all it's worth before it's all too late.

You see I have now created a to do list to realize my goals:

1) find out what shit I need to get together
2) get a hair cut
3) get my shit together
4) keep my shit together
5) kiss my (yes, younger) girlfriend on new year's evemy
6) Go to Naples, Italy in the next three years now that little sister will be transferring for the navy band next June. Or just go anywhere in Europe.
7) eat more fiber


It's a work in progress so cut me a little slack as I know some of you have been been doing this since you were 12.
public domain photo courtesy of wkipedia

Avoiding sleep still

I tried sleeping in this morning past the alarm, blankets weaved between my legs like blankets should be. I'd rather have my girlfriend's legs to wrap around mine and maybe this is why I'm up at one a.m. grilling chicken. Avoiding sleep again; listening to Jdob's voice sing those songs I love and missed this weekend.

Instead of being at her show Saturday I was on Hollywood Blvd at Tiny's k.o. having drinks and eating birthday cake of a friend barely an hour after completing the long drive from the Bay Area.

Well worth the fun trip though:

Rolled into the Bay Area around 4 A.M. Thursday morning to a fog topped Altamont Pass along with other early morning commuters from the central valley. Crashed on my mom's couch (I let S+J take the spare bedroom) for just enough sleep to drive safely into Oakland (on the Berkeley border) the next day to a little vegan pizza place on Shattuck called Pizza Plaza. Pretty tasty and, this is random, the owner looks a lot like Jesse Martin, or at least a younger relative of. Well that's more weird than random.

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't two timing my lunch with thoughts of Zachary's, Fat Slice or heck even Blondie's pizza just mere miles away but I was with friends that meant a little more than that.

Jumped through The City to the Golden Gate Bridge for our next leg of the day-trip. As a native to these parts I have taken many guest here but this was the first time any of us actually walked the damn thing. Mid-span we took a break to watch helicopters fly underneath the bridge, over the oil slick from the ship that hit the Bay Bridge causing a lovely oil spill the day before and back again.

What else? Lombard St, Coit Tower, half price at SF MOMA, dinner at Herbivore, ice cream at Maggie Mudds, and lastly a panoramic night view from atop Twin Peaks. This stop was also my first use the Decaux public sex booth pay toilets that are sloooowly coming to Los Angeles (article / photos).

Now the SF ones have been there for a few years, free to the public in high touristy spots, and it became obvious to us that they quickly separate the evolved from the retarded. How it works is simple: Press button to open door - use bathroom - door closes after you leave and structure self cleans - repeat. On two occasions we witnessed the later group try to interact with this simple concept of the self cleaning restroom and fail.

First was the drunk lady we first spotted dancing in the parking lot besides a music pumping sedan that would not wait for S to fully exit before barging in fully ignoring our warnings that she was going to be locked in and showered with high pressure nozzles. Sadly we we were wrong.

Second was the douche bag who threatened J with a totally BS remark of possibly having a gun when he was inside and then said some additional crap to J outside as he too explain the self cleaning concept to the lame ass. As we drove off we just had to roll down the window and yell at him for being such a retard: The douche had his arm blocking the door from closing so his skanky girlfriend cloud make use of the facilities without being hosed down with the magic bubble action J warned them about. All he could do is yell back some bad words and flip us off with his one free hand.

And we laughed all the way down the hill about that.
the end.

avoiding sleep

oh wonderful technology - you keep me up!

oh wonderful technology - you can't help me! oh no!

oh wonderful technology - why can't you tell me this post isn't as amusing to read as it is to write at 2.36 AM?

oh wonderful technology - I think I'm loopy for you!

oh wonderful technology - I think I'm going to bug my girlfriend thousands of miles away when she wakes up in a few minutes.

oh wonderful technology - thank you for putting her on the same wireless network!

oh wonderful technology - you make me all jittery.

oh maybe that's the caffeine.

pre trip rambling

I've fallen in love with music again and this week's timing couldn't have been better.

It's possible I've missed a few shows that where set in stone, encased in concrete, carved into flesh that I was to attend. Monday night wasn't any different - a headache - a worry - an early bed time for my old self.

Though this blog was somewhat neglected it didn't mean I wasn't doing my regular Kiss or Kill on Wednesdays or checking out the previous Monday line ups. Just enough show smiles to get me through the week: Hearts of Palm UK a few weeks back at the Echo with Castledoor, the Go Team! at Amoeba. Just enough.

I've been distracted the last month or two: B has been a positive change and her recent visit a major highlight. A close friend inserted a big negative for a short period but that was dealt with offline mostly save for the colorful blog comments here. T threw in a little, but far ominous dig one night. And $ is always an issue. These are deeper distractions / stories I'm not going to get into other the random fake LJ posts.

My life is ruled by initials lately apparently.

Maybe my distractions kept from learning earlier than Monday morning that my favorite artist is having a show the day I get back from the Bay Area. As far as I know it's been a three month absence from from shows (nearly as long updating the band's myspace) it's hard not to be concerned that something bad happen to someone I don't even know.

But maybe one simply needs a break sometimes.
Welcome back.

Deep Sea Diver (Jessica Dobson) @ The Prospector - Long Beach
Saturday Nov. 10th - 10 pm set time sharp - $5
with Greater California, Or, the Whale

Sunset Blvd closed Thur & Friday night

So Jim Carrey's new film is closing down Sunset Blvd completely Thursday and Friday night between the hours of 9 P.M. and 6 A.M.

Good luck getting to the Echo or Masa or returning movies at 50/50. I'm going out of town so thankfully I won't have to spend a hour to find parking a half mile from my apartment.

I made a google map of the areas here - It should work (crosses fingers)

**Filming in EP is welcomed - Not respecting the neighborhood isn't**
Read the messages in the Echo Park/Elysian Park Neighborhood Council Discussion Forum for more info.

~~~~~
Production company: Hearthlight Pictures, INC
Filming: Yes Man .... Permit: F-209578
Location: Sunset Bl from Park Ave - Echo Park Ave
Dates: 11/08/07 - 11/09/07 HOURS: 5:00 P.M. - 7:00 A.M.
[Um, rush hour traffic anyone?]

Description of Scene: Exterior dialogue. Stunt driving with cars and scooters [So so typical]. Near misses. [Like Number 23?] Camera and equipment on the sidewalk and in the street. 4 BB lights. Condors and cranes. Process trailers. Occasional traffic and pedestrian control. Wetting down of the streets. Film LA Monitor required: 11/08 - 11/09, 4:00 P.M. - 6:00 A.M.

I know myspace means nothing

but it does hurt when a close friend deletes you.
but I wasn't top 8 worthy to her so should I care?

last week

Halloween @ Kiss or Kill with photos.

I didn't dress up this year citing funds allocated for Becky's visit mixed with plain old laziness. My friend Kevin managed to slap to get a convincing Starbucks barista outfit for less than five bucks in five minutes that placed me at five times as lazy.

My cheap ass suckage indeed.

What I wore didn't matter to the dressed crowd that had started drinking early and focused on ways to receive attention from the other disguised patrons on the patio. I easily slipped unnoticed through the crowd like wait staff until on group of non-regulars sarcastically heckled "Nice costume!" onto me.

Stupid fuckers.

Sometimes I have nothing to show in defense when it come to clothing as it is a bit of luxury beyond simple jeans and interchangeable t shirts except tonight I possessed the color matching drink ticket of weeks past so I raised my free bottle to their mirthful, self congratulatory wit and went inside.

The Invisible Humans had already started their set; I dawdled having seen them before on an off night for me so my impression of them was on the blah side (good music - I was just too tired to care).

This was not the band I saw tonight: Entered to see them completely dressed in full skeleton suits, the room lights off with the only illumination from tiny lights on their masks and necks of their instruments. This Halloween getup just worked so well their electro rock that could make plain dick and jane lust after pale skin and blood red lips. I was impressed and afterwards one cute girl whispered to me the levels of intrigued she had hit right off stage - That set did it for her.

Ah the appeal of rock n roll.

Later on while waiting to use the restroom, the hecklers from before were locked inside the men's room touching themselves. Well I heard belts unbuckling, sniffing, and other not common bathroom noises, so ok, maybe they were just doing drugs. Three more minutes pass after I initially tried the handle, the door unlocks to see them doing something still with their clothes and hands, and paper, and that might be money which swirls quickly between each other. They look happy. The main heckler notices me awaiting their exit.

"Oh you've been waiting this whole time?"

Blankly blink a couple times. 'Asshole' I think to their backs.



Underwater City People played to a good drunken crowd of old fans and new folks next. Near the end they announced that it was a couple songs before the end when Thriller starts to play on the speakers prompting them to line up and reenact the whole dance routine. [insert picture here].

As for the other bands that night, Bang Sugar Bang played mostly KISS songs for their set and P-Cow inserted their version of Ministry's Everyday is Halloween into theirs.


Noticed this one girl who's path I've crossed from downtown bars to EP and Silver Lake and explained to Ash that we used to often give each other trying to place you looks until I (and her I presume) realized that this familiarity is only from crossing paths and not having any personal connection. Sort of a step below 'oh I read your blog' recognition to 'oh we just go to the same joints with zero friend cross pollination.'

No value to it.

Finished my second and last beer by the time P-Cow finished so back to the patio to flutter between friends, listening on, not participating, and not taking anything away for a bit. Friends attempted slight of hand tricks and bad foreign accents until we were kicked out at 2.40 and I escorted my friend in heels up the steep alley in the back.

She bitched the whole way.


This week @ Kiss or Kill: The Black Comets, The Power Cords,
Service Group, and another band TBD

The Ususal Suspects: I hate Mondays

'cause of too many free choices in LA.

I'm half surprise as you are that I am writing again. Often I have some drama related cause to my little blogging breaks, yet I can't really pinpoint the cause for this last one. Ok I have some ideas that I'll talk about later. Just saying I'm back if that matters.

So saddle up and sidle on down to today's late edition of TUS.


Kiss or Kill presents
The Randies / Porterville @ The Key Club
It's Metal Skool so rsvp at the usual places to get in for free.

I'm torn between that and The Softlightes @ Spaceland - Free every Monday in November

Waste time at the Viper for IO Perry and The Pity Party, free with rsvp

Casxio @ Silverlake Lounge every monday in November
tonight with Voxhaul Broadcast who I have yet to see but ooh I liked what I heard on myspace, also King Elementary

Anarchy in Hollywood night is now over at the Scene in Glendale (sure, why not?) with Beatmo at 9.30ish, Phantom .357, My Attitude, and Marie Catastrophe

Oh down in the OC:
Airborne Toxic Event with Cavil at Rest @ The Detroit Bar free?

A Big Orange Balloon

I took a little trip 400+ feet into the air this morning.



As part of the redevelopment of the former El Toro Airport and Marine base into Orange County Great Park, this wonderful orange sphere (Get it? Being in Orange County known at one time for large orange orchards) will take you up 250-500 feet into the air for FREE in 2007 2008 and beyond.

At over 1,300 acres, this will be one of the largest parks in Southern California with lakes, man made canyons, trails, sport fields and a museum district all within. Sadly it will still be located in Orange County.


The coastal haze sat around the region like thinned out cotton balls this morning so I would pegged visibility at just under a mile. Though floating in a stationary position just tethered to the ground, a sub standard view is plenty to keep you (actually me) distracted from that thing called a slight fear of heights.


After 15 minutes** up in the completely enclosed 30 person ring shaped cage, the cable gently pulled us down to Terra Firma with a soft thud. My stomach couldn't have been happier.

GreatParkBalloon.org
Just off the 5, just a few miles north of the Irvine Spectrum.


** I go up about once a month and as it gets more crowded (mid-day), they sometimes go up, stop for only a couple minutes and then bring you right down. Still free, so I can't complain much.